I am 32 years old. I am a long distance, open water swimmer. My dream is to be the first woman to swim across Lake Michigan (50 miles) and to be the first woman to swim a double crossing across the Straits of Mackinaw (10 miles). I swam 5 miles this summer in the Straits of Mackinaw in Michigan (USA). I had a mile to go but the currents pulled me off course. The water temps were in the mid 50's and had to get pulled out of the water by my rescue crew after 5 hours and 15 minutes, due to hypothermia. I did it all to raise awareness for mental illness, and suicide prevention. I raised money for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.
I struggle every day to find the hope to live life with mental illness. I suffer with Bipolar-2 disorder, PTSD, BPD, Adult ADD, and depression.
I am passionate about bringing awareness to mental health illnesses and suicide prevention (I attempted in 1997) and have self injured since I was about 8.
My hope is that when you find this page you will find a bit of inspiration, a bit of hope and a bit of who I am and what I love.
*Note: I do not claim any of the images on this page as my own (unless they are actually mine). If you are the artist and I failed to credit your work properly please let me know.
I had lost, more or less, everything.
I say that in a very qualified sense: I had a place to live, food to eat. I had clothes and the usual things one needs to survive. But I had lost what was most familiar, what was safest, what I knew best: I had lost an addiction. That addiction had been the center of my existence since I was a child. It had been my guiding principle, my closest companion, the thing I turned to for comfort, for answers, for assurance that I would be all right. It had been my god.
It had nearly killed me.
I fought like hell to keep it. I kicked and screamed and swore and sobbed. I begged to be allowed to hold it just a little while longer.
But in the end, I had to let it go.